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'That it will never come again, is what that makes life so sweet’ - Emily Dickson
When I first saw this phrase, I stopped to think for a while. It’s true isn’t it, the fact that what we experience in a second, whether good or bad, will not return again in the other. Our life is indeed, a life of a lifetime. Whatever experiences that I’ve had may not be all “cherry on top”, but they are something that I will never trade for anything at all in this world or universe. Oh, it suddenly struck me that I am very fortunate. I am actually very thankful for alot of things, like really really, alot! (:
I am first of all thankful for the wonderful family that I have; for my wonderful parents. It's very true, that we can only have one and only one pair of parents in this world. I am thankful for the way they’ve chosen to raise me up; although sometimes I feel abit unhappy about certain things, like how I can never sleepover at my friends’ place, or be home any later than 10pm etc. But then when I put myself in their shoes, I wonder, how am I going to raise my kids up in the future? I’ll prolly choose the same path given the social problems our society is facing today. [note that it’ll most likely be worst in the future] Bleahs. Okay, no, I’ll prolly loosen up for quite abit. Haha. (Y) This is just the present BUT my future, will be different. (:
I am also thankful for all those involved in my life. I think I am very fortunate to have people that I can talk to. And although I dont usually let people in, once they’re in, they’re there forever, god willings. (: There’s still alot of other things that I am thankful for in my life, and writing them here will take forever, so yes, I shall stop here for now. Haha.
I'm going to do my projects and some other stuffs now. There's like really really alot of stuffs need to be done. OMG. Freaking hectic! Gotta go. Toodles people! (:
I was a different person back then. And now after the same experiences again and again, there will always be these same kind of emotional trauma from bad memories that will hunt me. Nevertheless, there's also these different kinds of joy gathered from the lovely ones. And i can still picture it clearly in my mind. All of those, with you, me, him, she, them. I finally understood a small bit more about life. It’s all a matter of the right moment, when you finally choose to let go and realise that some things are just not meant to be the way you wanted.
To be honest, there are a lot of things that I want to do in future. Be it alone or together. Some are no longer feasible. Some, highly uncertain. I think deep down I am not as brave as how I’ve always thought myself to be. Gee.
I believe everything in life has already been decided and predestined. We do have some power in our destiny, though. ["May the force be with you." - Star Wars. -__-"] When I said we have power, it only applies to the hard work we could put in, the effort we could spend on the things we do. But ultimately, it is He who will decide the opportunities that we will receive in life, and it is He who will give us the answers to our prayers.
Whether you get the opportunities, whether things that happened in life will lead you to them is another thing altogether. There are too many forces influencing what will happen, what will not happen, and how the future will be like. Sometimes this really makes me wonder if I should grab hold of chances, or accept that some are meant to be lost. ): Nobody knows. I don’t even know if this is part of how my life should be. Who knows really? Hmm.
Sometimes, I think that perhaps…thinking and reconsidering too much, causes many opportunities to go away and be wasted. You might not know that we could still hold on and even have a long way to go. And that remains something I am not sure if I will regret in future, or rejoice. The future will never be certain until it becomes present.
Then again, I’ve made so many wrong choices before. But in the end they seemed to be right somehow. Some of course, not all. Even though in some areas my chances are taken away by circumstances and things that I have no control of, I’m glad that it has also given me other strengths..
P.S. Sometimes you have to be apart from the people you love, but that doesn't mean you love them any less. Sometimes it even makes you love them even more.
I'm sure everyone has at least seen their little vision of what they'll be down the road. Most would already be on their quest to achieve their vision while some would still be preparing. And yes, where would I put myself? Good question. 0.0
I'm the girl who didn't pack her bag well enough. Dangs. I think i've spent my secondary student days or even, primary student days, working up to this. It's a major achievement after all the setbacks I went through, but I'm good. Well, i hope so. Yeah. Well, not that pretty good laa. Bleahs! I'm not saying that i should totally be someone new to finally get what I want. I shall stay the way I am but I'll make some new, AWESOME improvements. (Y) Uh huh. :D People make resolutions at the start of a new year but i'm telling you, they'll eventually forget their way. I can see those already. Kind of loose, you know. Some will abide by them but what i'm saying is, resolutions are not items that can be crossed out of some grocery list but they're really there to remind us what our quest is all about.
Anywho, i have everything I need for this quest of mine, or at least I know I have. -___-" Beyond any doubts, i'll survive it. I'll go through it in any way. And I need time to prepare. How long? Approximately 10 more months nisah.
P.S. You know i do, i hope you too. I don't believe if you don't. Just don't...
The video below is a trailer for Dear John. *points to below* The director is behind the movie such as ‘The Notebook’ and ‘A Walk To Remember’. [actually, i have yet to watch The Notebook. kental. i know. diam eh. dush!]
I wanna watch this. Maybe, it'll make me cry like how ‘A Walk To Remember’ does. Okays, i teared a little while watching it. I mean, it's very touching. A guy finally met his true love. And the girl learnt to love when she doesn't know how to in the first place. But in the end, the girl can't spend the rest of her lifetime with him 'cause she's sick. And she just had no choice but to leave the world, everything... [gee. i'm starting to cry. wth! stop it sia nisah.] *smack forehead!*
P.S. Please make me stop remembering about him. I know imy, but i know i wouldn't want it this way.
I'm done with my first week of school. Yes. (: Honestly, it was hectic. Lots of assignments need to be done and also projects. I just hope that this time round my gpa would increase. *close eyes and pray* Anywho, tomorrow i'm helping out for the NP open house. Only one day. Obviously, it's gonna be the last day. (Y) Hoho.And well, since i got nothing much to keep me occupied for tmrw, i might as well, crash down to school right? Haha. I'll be ushering those "budak-budak kecik" touring my school. Afterall, they're gonna be freshies just like me. Er..Okay, nopes. I'm not one of those anymore. Not anymore. I'm in Year 1.5 already. Like how i used to say it. Hees. (:Anywho, i got nothing much to say here. So, i'll be draggy abit. Bleahs! -__-" My Hazwani just created a FB recently. Kental ke perrs. Hoho. After asking her to create it like few months back, which is obviously last year, and she did it this year. Best ke perr! Dangs. But seriously, i like. Especially about the post on my music search, to PANTAT BABOON, to Haz, to public apology. (Y) I'm telling you, my cheek jaw hurts and stomach hurts too. Blurghs! Thanks to the nonsense. Dush. Alrightys, i shall now broadcast some random pictures for this year. [i just wanna make it long. like flooood. bleahs! -_____-" ]
01.01.2010. Had a kite flying session with girlfriend. It was my experiment number one. (: Well, the story went like this. I was supposed to confirm with syahirah if we're going out, BUT i woke up late. (Y) Like real late. 1++ is considered uber late for me already. -___-" She texted me and i woke up with a shocked. Dangs. I got pissed off 'cause i totally forgot to set the alarm clock and confirm with her. *smack pipi* [thanks to me for sleeping late. dush!]
Sorry hor gf. (: So, i texted her and asked where should we go, and she asked me back. Best ke per. Lols. I got lazy to text her after multiples messages, and so i rang her up. Much more better. Decided to watch Avatar. BUT AGAIN, all cinemas fully booked, and the timing just sucks. It's at 2+,3+ and 5+. And coincidentally, mom told me that me that we're going to nenek house at 17.30!! Eh! Mengarut seh. So, ended up we didn't watch it. I suggested to her that we go to Henderson Waves, since she has yet to go. Eh, banyak kau punyer dah travel satu Singapore. Bleahs!
Again, tak menjadi. Time was not permitted for us. Dush! Sooooo, i told syahirah i wanted to do some kite flying. I've been wanting to do so. And, hell yeah, she know how to do it. The kite i mean! I got excited and we did it under a void deck. Our usual port. And, er, she created it and i just made myself busy by scotch taping it. LOLs. (Y) Honestly, i didn't know how to fly a kite. Well, not that i don't. Just that i forgot. Heh. Katerkan dah lamer tak main kan. -___-"
Overall, it was hell of a fun spending and playing kite flying with gf. I was sooo uber hyper ecstatic when MY KITE started to fly. I went awed! Hoho. (Y) Syahirah was happy but pissed off at the same time, 'cause over the years she did made some kite but it just won't fly not because of the wind, but the kite. Alaaa. Cian. But hey, with me, things always work. *kening naik turun* Hahaha! :D Bla bla bla. And oh, it did release stress you knoww. Heh. And then, we camwhore-ing throughout our lepak-ing time. Thankyous sya, for entertaining my crap and all. I like it alots. (: 
GOODBYE 2009! HELLOH 2010!HAPPY TWENTY-TEN EVERYONE! Have a good high start this year alright. Break a leg! [gee. how many times must i say that? dush!]
Every year, there has to be moments that you'd look back to remember. They're like the songs that keeps on playing over and over again in your head. And like every song, there is a compilation of the best songs. This compilation is called the 'Greatest Hits'. Anywho, i've told many stories by this blog and some are worth of telling once, some worth not telling anything, and some worth remembering for a lifetime. These stories led me to what I have now.
The great moments of your life won't necessarily be the things you do. They'll also be the things that happened to you. Now, I'm not saying that you can't take action to affect the outcome of your life. You have to take action. And you will. But never forget, that on any day, when you finally step out of the front door, thats when your whole life could change forever. You see, the Universe has a plan; and that plan is always in motion. It's a scary thought, but it's also kind of wonderful. All these little parts of the machine constantly working...making sure that you end up exactly where you're supposed to be...exactly when you're supposed to be there. It just need the right place, right person, and at the right time.
You see, as you look through life, you will see that there is so much more that we don't understand. And the only thing that we really know is things don't always go the way we planned. And thats what exactly i learnt in 2009. There's alot of obstacles that i had to overcome; studies, love, family, etcetra. But, thank god, i still survived. Though i still have bits of parcels to pick up. Anywho, overall, 2009 is a memorable year. Thankyous 2009. And thankyous, you.
Have an awesome, traintastic 2010 everyone! :D
